valleyboyabroad's Articles » Page 4
March 9, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
In Florida, the US, there was a protest last week against legislation that makes topless women a criminal act.   Although 1000 women were expected on the march, only 50 actually turned up and were greatly outnumbered by the thousands of, largely male, curious spectators.   Only one of the protestors, the organiser   Liz Book, actually removed her top.   She was promptly arrested.   In the US displaying ones chest is a crime for wom...
March 8, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Told by an Ethiopian Taxi Driver in Wellington, New Zealand. An Ethipoian, a Hindu and an American are travelling together on a train. A fellow passenger asked them what they thought of the nutritional value of Beef. The Ethiopian looked puzzled and asked 'What is nutritional value?' The Hindu also looked puzzled, and asked 'What is beef?' The American scratched his head in consternation and asked, 'What is an opinion?' yechydda
March 8, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Told by an Ethiopian Taxi Driver in Wellington, New Zealand. An Ethipoian, a Hindu and an American are travelling together on a train. A fellow passenger asked them what they thought of the nutritional value of Beef. The Ethiopian looked puzzled and asked 'What is nutritional value?' The Hindu also looked puzzled, and asked 'What is beef?' The American scratched his head in consternation and asked, 'What is an opinion?' yechydda
March 7, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Seen at the entrance to the train station at Auckland, New Zealand. 'The entrance to this magnificently tiled hallway leading to the station is unfortunately closed for maintenance work. We regret that the visitor is unable to view the majestic spleandour of this world famous and unique feature. Well thanks a bunch. yechydda,
March 6, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
The Welsh Taxi Driver. In Coober Pedy I met a Welsman who told me a little story. Many years ago he had been prospecting in Northwest Canada in a one horse town called Broken Stick for anything the earth would yield; ore, gold, oil anything that could be sold further south. There was one road in town a kilometer in length and dotted with higgledy-piggledy hotels, busy bars and bordellos. Men slept ten to a room where it was dangerous to light a cigarette because of the fartin...
March 1, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Dear all, In the outback, other than keeping whip snakes out of your swag bag, there is little to do other than gather around the camp fire with scrubby old diggers and swap tales of BLOOD CHILLING TERROR! On one particularly chill night, with a host of stars crowding the sky, an old aboriginal opal miner from Coober Pedy bade us gather around the flickering flames and crackling gum-bark to hear tell of the min-min lights. The min-min lights were named by the abor...
February 28, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
A small Chinese man pushes porter from the vast red-bricked megalith of Market City towards the rat infested destinations of of Chinatowns restaurants. His cargo is wide punnets of purple broccoli, and he sings to himself in a strange, alien sort of nasaly wail as he coughs and spits his way eyes shut  throught the familiar songlines between gawping tourists and touting waiters. A beautiful young woman in impossibly tight white jeans that draw the male eye to consider, is she or isn...
February 28, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
From the Australian Newspaper: 'There was another story doing the rounds in Sydney some years ago which, one could only assume, was a furphy but which, delightfully for those who live off the grist in the gossip mill, turned out to be true. It was divorce time for a well-heeled couple and things were unusually acrimonious. He was in London on business, she here in the family mansion from which he had not moved. The telephone ran hot with screaming, tantrums, threats and accusations. Sh...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
This week the Libyan Prime Minister said that his country was not responsible for the Lockerbie bombing in 1988. He said that his country only argreed to take responsibility so that sanctions and travel restrictions would be lifted and ordinary Libyans could then 'get at the white women who were easy' Following outrage in the US, the Prime MInister later withdrew his remark, saying 'Okay then we did do it'. The US has accepted the retraction saying 'They have done what they needed...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Israeli troops this week have seized over $8 million US dollars in raids on Palstinian banks, claiming the money was ear-marked for terrorism. An Israeli bank robber, sorry, spokesperson, said from his new Penthouse flat that the money seized would be used to improve the lives of ordinary Palestinian people. This would include paying for an extension to the wall being built to protect the Palestinians from themselves, along with a new swimming pool for his wifes servants tennis partner...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
A British Conservative party MP has been sacked following a racist remark concerning the recent tragedy in Morecombe Bay, where seventeen Chinese migrants were drowned in incoming tides while gathering shellfish. The Member of Parliament was reported as saying, 'I'm fed up with Indian food, let's go to Morecombe Bay for a Chinese'. The Conseravtive Leader of the Opposition is said to be sad with regard to the sacking, pointing out that it was no longer acceptable to poke fun at th...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
A British Conservative party MP has been sacked following a racist remark concerning the recent tragedy in Morecombe Bay, where seventeen Chinese migrants were drowned in incoming tides while gathering shellfish. The Member of Parliament was reported as saying, 'I'm fed up with Indian food, let's go to Morecombe Bay for a Chinese'. The Conseravtive Leader of the Opposition is said to be sad with regard to the sacking, pointing out that it was no longer acceptable to poke fun at th...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Protests surrounding Mel Gibsons blood spattered epic, The Passion of Christ, has alarmed Jewish Communities fearing that they would be blamed for his crucifixion. Mel Gibson has reluctantly agreed to change the script of the Sequel so that the ultimate blame for Christ's crucifixion would be laid elsewhere. It is believed that in the sequel, 'The Passion II, The Resurrection', to be sponsored by Viagra, will emphasise that the responsibility for Christs death was entirely due to a co...
February 27, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
Protests surrounding Mel Gibsons blood spattered epic, The Passion of Christ, has alarmed Jewish Communities fearing that they would be blamed for his crucifixion. Mel Gibson has reluctantly agreed to change the script of the Sequel so that the ultimate blame for Christ's crucifixion would be laid elsewhere. It is believed that in the sequel, 'The Passion II, The Resurrection', to be sponsored by Viagra, will emphasise that the responsibility for Christs death was entirely due to a co...
February 26, 2004 by valleyboyabroad
The worst thing in the world is getting to the bra just behind a group of four women out for a drink. With four blokes it's two pints of this and two pints of that no problem. Sorted. With women, well: Barman to four women out for a drink together: 'What it'll be then girls?' Claire: 'Oh, I'll have a vodka and coke please. Oh, make that a diet coke  Barman goes off, barman returns: 'Here we are then' Claire: 'Oh can I have some ice with that' He goes off. He r...